“ It still loves the night and flirts with living on the edge.” (Cool rules)
Flipping through magazines or looking around on streets, you see cool. Cool people, cool technology, cool trends, etc. But what is cool? The definition given by dictionary is “ The best way to say something is neat-o, awesome, or swell. The phrase "cool" is very relaxed, never goes out of style, and people will never laugh at you for using it, very convenient for people who don't care about what's "in.” (Urban dictionary) "Cool" is an essence, an attitude, a skill only portrayed by the very best actors, cool is eternal (Matthew). Cool can mean a lot of things, it can be the sense of lifestyle one lives, the way one looks or an object one wears. Even though everyone has a different idea of cool, it is created by the roles one plays day by day. These roles we play make us who we are and are shaped by all that surrounds us.
Every single person has a role they play and it usually changes depending whether at home, work or school. One might say role? Does that mean that my whole life is just play, it’s not real? No but we do fall into little scripts daily but it doesn’t necessarily mean the performances can’t be real. When I lost a friend, I cried and mourned for him so I played the role of the mourner or friend. But it didn’t mean my “script” was fake, because I really was upset and sad when he passed away. These roles we get from different sources make up our identity and can be authentic at times or not.
One of the main things that shape the roles we play is family and friends, starting from when we are born. Our parents raise us and try to impress the certain values, ideas and lifestyle they have upon us. And it affects our view on cool as well. We are all the products of our family and they are the product of their families (Andy). So we begin to create an identity that works in our home, for me it was being the “good girl”. Who didn’t throw a tantrum when older brother made me be Robin, when really I wanted to be Batman, always ate at the dinner table, was respectful, etc. But my parents weren’t the only ones who influenced me in the scripts I began to play, my older brother also did. When I was younger, he was my idol, tried to listen to whatever he was listening to or play the videogames he would and try to be as good (sadly I never was).
These identities we grow up with to fit in our families just might not work in the real world, like in school, work or street. When we begin school all the kids soon influence us as well. Kids, who we realize did not grow up like us, so have different ideas of what cool is. For me in elementary school it was more about making friends, friends who my mother knew their mothers and they knew her, the “good” boys and girls. But in middle school I began to choose my own friends and cool became so much more important because for them it was as well. Because I grew up with no sisters, I watched girls in school to see what a girl “should” wear and what was “in.” It was hard because my identity at home didn’t work at school and vice versa, for example wearing the prettiest skirt was cool at school but at home it was cooler passing certain level in the hottest videogame of the moment.
Once we begin high school, as adolescents being cool is what we all desire, but one must work harder to adapt to what our certain group of friends find cool. The elements you need to ever be cool, ask any teenager are being good – looking, popular, trendy, wearing the name brand clothes, having sex, being confident, and so much more depending on what friends we surround ourselves with. We start to play scripts one might not want to play but need to in order to be cool. We create different identities for ourselves that aren't original but come from other sources because we are trying to impress others and live up to our audience’s expectations of cool all the time (Larche).
Our family and friends isn’t the only thing that surrounds us and creates our identity, death does too. All around us people are dying and we all know we will too some point, so one thinks what the hell am I doing here? Thus we create an identity shaped by our surroundings making us feel important. This sense of importance helps “cover” the hole of emptiness we have due to the fact that we will die and soon everyone we know will as well and it’ll be like we never existed. So we choose to play roles instead of crawling up in ball shaking and crying about something we can’t change, one must die someday.
Even when we act cool or create a cool pose its just another way to “ keep the lid on the most intense feelings and violent emotions.” (Cool Rules) And most of these emotions and feelings come from us trying to spend our lives trying to become complete before we die. We always want something a lover, clothing, home, money, etc but it’s never enough, we always want more. So we continue to play scripts that make us feel good but this never lasts, making our whole life a performance.
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage,
And then is heard no more. It is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing. – Hamlet: Shakespeare (Act 5, Scene 5)
We try to live a meaningful life, but in the end it means nothing we die and our life’s performance “is heard of no more.” In this life we try to feel important, be cool, or play roles and I think this is what Shakespeare meant when he says, “ That struts and frets his hour upon the stage.” Death is just another thing that surrounds us and shapes who we are.
Whether it is our family, friends or death that shape us, they help us create our identities. Identities that have their own idea of what one finds cool. We spend our lives trying to play these roles or scripts that are influenced by what we are surrounded by, so our family, society or friends approve us. But we must also remember to not forget what we want as well. And how do we know what we want? Well I’m still figuring out that myself.
Work Cited Page
Urban Dictionary - http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=cool
Hamlet by William Shakespeare - Act 5, Scene 5
Larche's triangle partner post (Larche)
Matthew's triangle partner post ( Matthew)
Cool Rules - (cool rules: Anatomy of an attitude – Dick Pountain and david robins – yr 2000)
